Working Mom Series: Steph

Meet Steph and her son, Teddy 👶

I met Steph in a gym called BOLO in Toronto. She was the HIIT instructor and made the whole group sweat with her energetic, dynamic exercises and an upbeat music playlist. I loved how friendly, approachable and knowledgable she was about her craft. Like Joana she made the HIIT workout into a fun session where you actually learn something new about yourself and your body. She’s also built a great community on IG where she shares useful tips on pregnancy and postpartum fitness. But most of all, I like how real and open she is about her parenting journey, postpartum body image and becoming a new mom.

Her son, Teddy, was born a few months ahead of Lev and she was one of the first people to reach out to me on IG with words of encouragement when I needed it the most. I remember how in the early days I’d breastfeed Lev at 3 am half-asleep, half-awake, my body and mind sore from postpartum recovery and I saw a message from her simply saying that I was doing great and reminding me that somewhere out there were so many other moms who were doing exactly the same thing I was doing right now and it put me at ease. I started connecting with more and more new moms online after that and it was so refreshing. I knew there was a mom tribe on IG, but I didn’t expect the tribe to be so powerful, supportive and welcoming!

In this interview, Steph shares her thoughts on being a full-time employee, having a side business and becoming a mom. I hope you like it!

My name is Steph Park and I’m a first-time mom to my son.

His government name is Theodore but we call him Teddy. As he gets older maybe he’ll want to be called Theodore, or Theo, who knows. But we wanted to give him that choice. We live in the west end of Toronto, between the Junction and North York. 

Prior to my maternity leave, I worked from 9-5 in pharmaceuticals. I’m also a personal trainer and coach with a specialization in training pregnant and postpartum athletes, so I run classes, create special programs and provide one-on-one training with moms across the GTA.

When I became pregnant, I knew that movement would be a big part of my journey. However, I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of information on pregnancy and I was confused by the guidance I could find for exercising during pregnancy. It was vague and based around avoidance: “keep your heart rate below 140 BPM”; “don’t lift more than 25 pounds”.  

During my pregnancy, I shifted my mindset to start training in a way that honoured this special chapter of my life. I began integrating strategies to protect and preserve my core and pelvic floor as best as possible, knowing that it would serve me well in my postpartum phase. 

I wanted to be the coach for women that I didn’t have for myself during this time, so I became a certified Pregnancy and Postpartum Athleticism coach. 

I took special care to treat my mental and emotional health with the same care that I did my physical health, developing the coaching method that I wish I had had access to when I entered this phase of my life.

On her typical day and going back to work:

I’ve taken a full eleven months away from my full time job in pharma, but I originally had expected to only need four weeks off after giving birth to start back up with my personal training clients. In reality I needed way more time, so I pushed all those commitments back by nearly another month. I started seeing clients virtually at about seven weeks postpartum. 

Typical day usually starts as early as 7am, or as late as 8am, it really depends on what time Teddy decides to wake up. Some morning I’ll have early morning virtual clients so I’ll be up and down in our home gym training with clients while my husband takes care of Teddy.

However, by 9am, I am on full mom duty.

Teddy currently takes two to three naps a day, so during his naps I squeeze in a workout, make some food for myself, clean, do dishes and bottles, program sessions for clients and work on course work for my own professional development. Between entertaining Teddy, feeding him bottles and solids, cleaning up after he eats and chasing him around the house, when 6pm rolls around my husband takes over to give me a second to myself before I start making dinner. My husband is usually on bedtime duty so I’ll help him get started and then it's my time to relax. 

My in-laws live in the city so my mother-in-law comes over on Mondays, which is my busiest client day, and she watches Teddy while I work with clients. When I go back to work full time in February, we’re really fortunate that our moms will be moving in with us and alternating childcare responsibilities every two weeks.

On challenges that come with being a working mom:

Some of the biggest challenges for working moms include prioritizing themselves. I do my best to make time to fill up my cup and take care of myself, both mentally and physically. Other challenges for a working mom can include maintaining a healthy work life balance, dealing with the never-ending efforts to multitask, and grappling with mom guilt.  

I love the balance of being able to work and use my adult brain but also the time away from Teddy while I work makes me appreciate and be so much more present in the moments we do spend together. Also, after being apart for some time, seeing Teddy’s face light up and arms reaching for me when we reunite is one of my favourite things ever.  

Motherhood is extremely rewarding but having to chase around a very mobile and very energetic infant on next to no sleep can quickly lead to feeling burnt out, combined with an overwhelming sense of feeling like I’m underperforming in all areas of my life: mother, wife, friend. I don’t think that makes me a bad mother, it just makes me human.

My way of coping with it is to communicate it to my husband, as hard as it can be. Being open about it and having support from your partner to figure out what we can do to make me feel better has helped. Most times it’s figuring out how we can re-shuffle some responsibilities, even temporarily, or just finding time to step away and get out of the house on my own for an hour or so to decompress. Also, having my parents come and stay with us so that I can get some extra help and extra shut eye, is definitely helpful. 

Having had a small taste myself of being a working mom these last couple months, I’m even more appreciative of my own working mom and all the other moms out there that juggle career and family.

I think it’s important to understand that some days are just going to be tougher than others. Almost certainly you will feel like you’re being pulled in all different directions and maybe you’ll be afraid of being an underperformer in one of the areas that is important to you. Remember to be kind to yourself in these moments.

In the long run, that stress will pass and the people that love you will still be there for you. Focus on taking care of yourself, your relationships and your family, and things will work out in the end.